A lifelong lover of the band ABBA has mistakenly signed up for a course of Applied Behaviour Anaylsis, it has been reported.

When autistic woman Paula Mulberry, 32, arrived at We Don’t Care Therapy Centre, she believed she was auditioning for an upcoming tribute band. The reality, unfortunately, would hit rather differently. “I knew something was up. There were three other people in the room, yet none of them were in flares,” she said.

When Mulberry burst into the room singing, “Chiquitita, tell me what’s wrong?”, therapists told her exactly what was wrong: her autism. 

“My next song was, I Do, I Do, I Do,” Mulberry explained. “Unfortunately, they took that as verbal consent to start the session.” 

Therapists then started offering Mulberry rewards for decreased inappropriate behaviours. “One of the women kept requesting Eye Contact. I said, sorry, I’d never heard of that one.”

Mulberry described spending the remaining 50 minutes staring at the ceiling, wishing she was somewhere else instead. 

Like what you’ve read so far? Make us your new special interest! Help us grow The Daily Tism by sharing our articles, following us on InstagramXBluesky  and Facebook and subscribing to our Patreon for exclusive content that’ll have your neurotypical family saying “I’m not sure I’m the target audience”.