An autistic woman has succeeded in projecting the image of a regular adult lady just long enough to earn the admiration of an actual regular adult lady, sources have claimed.

Tricia Squire, 36, managed to style her bridesmaid’s dress in a way that made it look like she actually enjoyed wearing it, and gave a confident and charming toast at her sister’s wedding. Following a glowing compliment by a guest in the loos afterwards, Squire reportedly feels as though she has passed the entrance exam to being a real human woman.

Squire said: “I feel like I’ve pulled off a con. I have created the illusion of a nonthreatening femininity that sits comfortably within me and elicits a positive social response from the type of woman I subconsciously modelled my mask on.”

“What will I do with this newfound power? Maybe I’ll enjoy a marginally easier job market and never have anyone question my competence! Or maybe my parents will significantly lower their standards for my behaviour! That’s what happens to Normal Women, isn’t it?”

Tricia’s sister, Freya, said: “No, Trish, that’s not women you’re thinking of.”

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