An autistic woman who spent October 31st hand sewing the finishing touches to her elaborate costume is reportedly ready for a glorious evening of eating snacks alone in the dark.

Lottie Fitzgerald, 32, says that she has always been keen on costumes and dressing up, but has absolutely no desire to share her creative vision with the world.

Fitzgerald said: “I absolutely love Halloween. Last time I went out on Halloween some douchebag spilled a sticky drink all over my lovely outfit and another kept yelling in my ear about the growth of AI in business-to-business sales strategies. I want good-natured spooky fun, not actual terror.”

“I just want a lovely evening all dressed up and looking amazing, tucked under a blanket on my sofa, eating pickled onion Monster Munch as Doctor Frankenstein intended.”

“Anyway, my costumes are always an anatomy pun, and nobody ever gets it,” added Fitzgerald. “I’ve been Ulna Thurman, which was her Pulp Fiction outfit with the forearm bones drawn on; a non-stick frying pancreas; and this year I’m dressing up as a Lumbarjack: I’ve got a checked jacket, fake chest hair, and fabulous back support.”

Fitzgerald could not be reached for further comment, as she had locked her front door and started watching Hocus Pocus while snuggling a full-size axe.

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