Man trapped in “Kafkaesque nightmare” realises it’s just his autism assessment
A man who thought he was living in a Kafkaesque nightmare has reportedly been informed that he is just in the middle of the autism assessment process. Naveed Azkhat, 39, felt himself becoming crushed under the weight of an unseen authority that wants him to...
Autistic woman asked to rate pain from 1 to 10 has several clarifying questions
An autistic woman who was asked to rate her pain on a scale from 1 to 10 has so many follow-up questions that her doctor’s appointment risks becoming an interrogation, according to reports. Paige Thomas, 24, attends regular appointments for her chronic pain, although she...
Autistic person’s break time just ruminating about work with the TV on
An autistic person reportedly spends their work breaks continuing to think about work, albeit in front of a larger screen. Avery Mann, 49, values the moments they get to decompress from their work-from-home admin job, but has never actually decompressed, instead agonising over everything that...
Beanie Baby listening to you vent doesn’t think you’re being unreasonable
The Beanie Baby listening to your latest frustrated rant thinks you’re totally in the right, according to reports. Mark, 16, a cuddly buffalo with dinky beanbag hooves, has been perched attentively on your bed, watching with calm round eyes as you tearfully offload about your...
Autistic woman due for sudden attack of The Sadness for no discernible reason
An autistic woman in an Entirely Fine period of her life is reportedly about to be hit with a profound wave of melancholy, just because. Noriko Hamazaki, 38, bounced out of bed after a restful sleep, threw on her comfortable dungarees and cycled to her...
Autistic message ends text chain forever
An autistic person’s seemingly inoffensive text message has caused the recipient to stop replying altogether, it has been reported. Des Ackerman, 19, was chatting to new friend Alma Montague, 20, about improv when they sent a message that spelled the end of the conversation, and...
Autistic woman successfully performs womanhood long enough to be complimented by another woman
An autistic woman has succeeded in projecting the image of a regular adult lady just long enough to earn the admiration of an actual regular adult lady, sources have claimed. Tricia Squire, 36, managed to style her bridesmaid’s dress in a way that made it...
Jackpot! AuDHD woman thinks she’s found natural gap to interject in conversation
An AuDHD woman believes she has finally found the right opening to join a group conversation, according to sources. Sarah Harrow, 24, has been awkwardly skirting the fringes of a lively group chatting at a party, but has just lined up a pithy reply to...
Shit! ADHD winning on the day you really needed the autism to dominate
Your ADHD has, unfortunately, come to the fore on the exact day you needed your autism front and centre, it has been rumoured. Your autism, your age, would have been really useful for all these bank forms you needed to fill, and you were really...
Crisis! No one around for squeezy hug
An autistic woman has been left in a state of emergency after no one was around to hug her until her eyes popped out of her head, according to sources. Merve Öztürk, 34, reportedly experienced a wave of overwhelm while trying to defrost her freezer,...
