An autistic woman’s extensive tarot collection is keeping suspiciously schtum about her decision to buy yet more packs of cards, sources have revealed.

Kelsey Dacey, 27, was gifted her first deck by a friend as an alternative to suggesting an autism assessment – but soon found herself splashing out on more and more lavish decks.

Dacey said: “It started with the Rider-Smith-Waite deck, and I just thought it was fun, you know? It was a way to avoid taking responsibility for difficult decisions, AND there were lots of pictures of weird little guys to admire! What’s not to like?”

Now Dacey, a proud owner of eight books on tarot, a special bit of fabric for doing spreads on, and fifteen entire tarot decks, in styles including but not limited to: old-fashioned cartoons; kittens in hats; old medical textbooks; Beatrix Potter; and the cast of the 1990s sci-fi show Farscape, has decided to consult the cards for advice on cutting back her spending.

“It’s so strange,” Dacey said. “No matter what spread I draw, it always seems to end up
saying ‘It’s up to you, I guess’. Who am I to go against the will of the cards?”

At the time of writing, Dacey was scrolling through Etsy with a glint in her eye, with the search results ordered from most to least expensive.

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