Woman deemed “complex” by mental health services actually basic bitch
An autistic woman who was described as “complex” by her team of mental health professionals has been revealed to be pretty basic, reports can confirm. Paige Emerson, 26, from Castlefield, might have “a lot going on psychologically” according to a room of therapists – yet...
I lived it! Autistic woman misdiagnosed as vampire
A 39-year-old woman has finally received an autism diagnosis after years of being misdiagnosed as a bloodsucking creature of the night, it has been announced. Siobhan Moorton’s autistic traits were reportedly missed due to the sheer volume that overlapped with vampirism. Moorton explained: “My light...
Autistic woman who “loves everything fall” breaks leg tumbling from window
A autistic woman who saw several Instagram posts captioned “get fall ready” took this as a literal instruction and has hurled herself from an upstairs window, reports have indicated. Sarah Harrow, 33, from Huddersfield, hates pumpkin-spice lattes, but loves the feeling of descending from a...
Phew! Woman with body dysmorphia actually looking at reflection in spoon
An autistic woman who has always hated her body has discovered that while this is mostly due to patriarchal beauty standards, it is also due to her having always used a spoon to view her reflection. Emma Bernard, 35, had suffered from body dysmorphia her...
Most dramatic fortnight of women’s life coincides with therapist’s annual leave
An autistic woman has been left “shocked and upset” that her Extremely Difficult Time has conflicted with her therapist’s yearly holiday to Greece, it has been rumoured. Despite having answered “fine” when she was asked about her how her week had been in her most...
Psychologists to screen autistic patients for comorbid imposter syndrome
Anyone receiving an autism diagnosis will automatically be referred to be assessed for imposter syndrome, it has been confirmed. The move comes following a campaign from autistic activist, Paige Thomas, 34, whose own suspected imposter syndrome is still undiagnosed. She said: “I just felt it...
“Is it my period?” wonders woman who is clinically insane regardless
A woman considered generally unstable at the best of times is wondering whether her period might be to blame, according to reports. Ellie Mulligan, 31, from Prestwich, insists her mood fluctuations are related to a specific phase of her menstrual cycle – despite being objectively...
Woman who told depressed friend to “reach out” didn’t mean to HER
A woman who told her clinically depressed autistic friend to reach out if she felt bad meant for her to reach out to someone else, it has been confirmed. Karen Hoyland, 38, told Emma Bernard, 34, that she should “talk to someone about these feelings,”...
Helpful mum LOVES commenting on daughter’s eating habits
A mother’s favourite pastime is commenting on her adult autistic daughter’s eating habits “out of concern for her wellbeing,” reports have indicated. Liz Thomas, 54, from Huyton – who was recently heard describing 0% fat soya yogurt as “moreish” – is horrified that her daughter,...
Prodigy! Undiagnosed autistic woman really good at eating disorder
An undiagnosed autistic woman has discovered she’s absolutely amazing at having an eating disorder. Paige Thomas, 19, from Elton, has an innate talent for using food to regulate uncomfortable emotions – as opposed to actually feeling them. “It’s absolutely foolproof,” Thomas told us proudly. “To...
