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    Health, News

    Autistic woman merrily embracing spooky season unaware of seasonal depression crouched in the bushes 

    An autistic woman enjoying the early days of autumn is blissfully unaware that her seasonal depression is waiting to pounce, eyewitnesses have claimed. Sarah Harrow, 40, has spent the past few weeks enjoying the crunch of fallen leaves under her boots, drinking hot chocolate and...
    Sarah Amero, 12 hours ago 2 min read  
    Love, News

    Autistic couple keen to assert that neither of them is the big spoon 

    An autistic couple have issued a joint public statement clarifying that neither of them has ever been, currently are, or plan to be, the big spoon. Alix Gardner and Des Ackerman, both 29, held a press conference yesterday to assert that there is no room...
    Sarah Amero, 2 days ago 1 min read  
    Celebrities, News

    Audiences baffled as TV detective not even a little bit autistic 

    Crime drama fans have been left bewildered by Channel 4’s latest offering, which features a sleuth protagonist so neurotypical that he is completely unrecognisable as a detective, critics have claimed. Hart of the Matter stars Noah Michaels as Detective Inspector Graeme Hart. Hart describes himself...
    Laura Richmond, 2 days ago 2 min read  
    News, Work

    Autistic woman can leave work toilets any time she fucking feels like it 

    An autistic woman hiding in a toilet cubicle at work can reportedly leave whenever she wants, alright? Alma Montague, 31, has merely taken a brief respite from her colleagues on the Sales team, just so she can briefly curse herself for taking a job in...
    Sarah Amero, 4 days ago 2 min read  
    News, Travel

    Brace! Plane crash actually less scary than nine hours in airborne tin of human sardines 

    An autistic person’s fear of flying has been misinterpreted as a fear of crashing, when in fact they had begun to feel that plummeting to almost certain death might be a blessed relief, sources have revealed. When Alix Gardner, 44, was seen crouched beside the...
    Laura Richmond, 5 days ago 1 min read  
    Health, News

    AuDHD man’s gut issues the only thing standing between him and drinking hot sauce 

    An AuDHD man’s gut issues are the only reason he isn’t necking shots of hot sauce whenever he needs a little thrill, according to sources. Robert Noot, 24, is so understimulated by the act of eating a regular homecooked meal that he needs to douse...
    Sarah Amero, 6 days ago 2 min read  
    Family, News

    Argh! Autistic woman starts conversation she doesn’t want to finish  

    An autistic woman has accidentally started a conversation she doesn’t have the spoons to continue, loved ones have claimed.  Brenda Hernández, 34, reportedly made a passing comment to her mother, Lucia Ruiz, 58, about wishing she could install air con in her rented property, prompting...
    Sara Gibbs, 7 days ago 2 min read  
    Friendships, News

    First domino falls in undiagnosed neurodivergent friend group  

    The first of a group of undiagnosed neurodivergent friends has finally figured it out, making it only a matter of time before the others start toppling into a big heap of late-discovered burnout, reports have indicated.  Talia Cohen, 28, who started to suspect she might...
    Sara Gibbs, 1 week ago 2 min read  
    News, Work

    AuDHD man’s WFH just him going for an 11am coffee and forgetting to bring his laptop 

    An AuDHD man’s day of working from home has so far consisted of him going to a coffee shop to work and realising he hasn’t brought any actual work with him, witnesses have said. Ethan Stern, 31, envisioned a quiet yet industrious day of working...
    Sarah Amero, 1 week ago 2 min read  
    Love, News

    Autistic woman assesses prospective partners for gnawability 

    An autistic woman evaluates potential partners by making sure they are pleasant enough to chew on, it has been reported. Mary Walker, 34, has been on several dates, but has yet to find someone with the right sort of body composition to be a living,...
    Sarah Amero, 1 week ago 2 min read  
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