Grisly! AuDHD woman‘s home contains graveyard of special interests
An auDHD woman is basically a serial killer but for special interests, authorities have claimed. Police discovered a vast graveyard of remnants of bygone special interests in the residence of Ffiona Maw, 40, with the accused allegedly having kept trophies from over 200 victims. PC...
Autistic woman in slasher movie becomes final girl by never answering phone
An autistic woman in a slasher movie has become the final girl by default thanks to her aversion to picking up phone calls. Lottie Fitzgerald, 21, was reportedly the intended victim of anonymous murderer, Ghostface, but despite numerous attempts, she could not be contacted. Ghostface...
Autistic boy goes trick-or-treating as sheet with eye holes cut out
An autistic boy’s Halloween costume has caused him to be repeatedly be mistaken for a ghost despite him clearly being a boy wearing a sheet with eye holes cut out, sources have revealed. Finley Rice, seven, had been excited to unveil his homemade costume, but...
Smart! Autistic woman to deter trick-or-treaters by placing orange severed head by door
An autistic woman has announced plans to scare trick-or-treaters away by appointing a severed head carved from a spooky orange vegetable the guardian of her door. Megan Aldrich, 40, made the decision after last year’s hanging skeleton failed have the desired effect. Aldrich explained: “I...
I lived it! Autistic woman misdiagnosed as vampire
A 39-year-old woman has finally received an autism diagnosis after years of being misdiagnosed as a bloodsucking creature of the night, it has been announced. Siobhan Moorton’s autistic traits were reportedly missed due to the sheer volume that overlapped with vampirism. Moorton explained: “My light...
Autistic woman celebrates spooky season by getting ghosted again
An autistic woman has marked the arrival of spooky season by getting ghosted once more, it has been rumoured. Niamh Callaghan, 26, had been engaging in flirty banter with Cameron Brereton, 29, for a little over three weeks when he abruptly disappeared from all social...
Halloween movie night ruined when horror film turns out to be vintage autism charity commercial
An autistic man’s Halloween movie night has been ruined after he accidentally put on an Autism Speaks commercial from 2009. Mac Wheatley, 32, showed the commercial to his group of close friends after mistaking the threatening music and ominous voiceover for a low-budget horror. Wheatley...
Spooky season? This autism researcher is a ghoul year-round
An autism researcher has opted not to wear a Halloween costume this year as he is always a ghoul regardless of the season. Leading autism expert, Dr. Graeme Hart, reportedly does not initially appear to be a ghoul, looking outwardly like a human man –...
Torn apart! My therapist hates his therapist
An autistic couple have reportedly split after realising they have incompatible therapists. Dexter Livingstone, 35, and Paige Thomas, 32, made the decision to end their one-year relationship as psychotherapists Becky Armitage and Olivia Buckingham couldn’t make things work. Thomas said: “Dexter and I really did...
Wow! Autistic couple making ecstatic noises in bedroom must be enjoying bashing train sets together
An autistic couple loudly moaning with pleasure in their bedroom are “having a great time playing with their train sets,” their housemates have said. Paige Thomas, 26 and boyfriend Dexter Livingstone, 28, are frequently overheard from behind their closed door groaning, sighing and shouting “fuck...
