An autistic woman has issued a statement explaining that her facial expressions and tone of voice are unable to work together due to having entirely different visions for their performances.
Ellie Mulligan, 33, has spent three decades trying to foster a positive collaboration between the two temperamental artists – but formally announced the split, which she described as “tragic but inevitable.”
Mulligan said: “The problem is that they both want to do their own thing. My face wants to look completely impassive at all times, while my voice wants to perform a mini spoken-word aria.”
“Neither of them seems to understand that they’re working towards a project larger than their individual parts,” she continued. “And are therefore completely unable to compromise – unless they’re compromising my ability to make friends.”
“They’ve both said they’re just going to do their own thing from now on,” she added. “And I’m like, sorry? What were you doing before??”
“I guess I could try to rehire my body language, but we haven’t spoken since it quit a decade ago.”
Like what you’re reading? Make us your new special interest! Help us grow The Daily Tism by sharing our articles, following us on Instagram, Bluesky, Threads and Facebook, shouting us a coffee on Ko-Fi or joining our bonus-content-packed Club for Terrible Autistics by subscribing to our Patreon. We also now have merch! Check out your favourite headlines in comfy wearable form over on Teemill.
You can also watch episodes one and two of our sketch show, The Daily Tism News, in collaboration with Turtle Canyon Comedy, or listen to episode three in audio form – and tune into our podcast, Autistic Women Oversharing to find out WAY too much about our writers.
