An autistic woman who meets every one of a job’s specifications has been left dismayed to discover she also needed a PhD in ungodly amounts of charm, it has been reported.
Paige Thomas, 31, from Doncaster, has three degrees and almost a decade of relevant experience – yet now admits she should have spent that time crafting a more superficially likeable personality.
Thomas told us: “I always get my tasks done by lunchtime and never miss a deadline. Understandably I missed out today because I forgot to whip my arm out for a handshake and shamelessly flatter the employer, which is entirely essential for a job based on Excel.”
“I’m just so glad it’ll go to Kelsey, who will no doubt stand around nattering by the coffee machine getting fuck all done,” Thomas continued. “But she managed to keep the corners of her mouth raised the whole time and laughed insincerely at every one of the senior manager’s jokes, so I guess she deserves it.”
Company recruitment consultant, Graeme Hart, 43, commented: “There was something a little off about Paige. We’re not quite sure what.”
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