An autistic woman has died on her arse following yet another gag unsuitable for her workplace, it has been confirmed. 

Niamh Montague, 29, from Hull, was sitting in the shared office during the Friday afternoon conversation – which had previously included topics such as Tricia having her kitchen done and Deborah’s defrosted mince, along with other things she didn’t give a shit about.

Colleague Sarah Harrow, 33, explained: “I started a civilised discussion about a documentary that had aired the previous night on euthanasia.”

Following this, Montague had piped up, “Girls’ trip?” – before instantly remembering where she was. 

Supervisor Liz McHodge, 43, commented: “Yesterday she said she was thinking about hurling herself from the window of the staff toilet. She looked quite happy at the prospect.”

“Is Niamh alright?” Colleague Julie Walker, 54, asked. “When I asked about her weekend plans, she told me she’d be plugging in her toastie maker. In the bath.”


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