An autistic potter has only just realised that she has been conducting an intense love affair with a ghost for the last three months, and not just teaching him about creating earthenware, it has been announced.
Dexter Livingstone, 27, started turning up in the workshop of Paige Thomas, 28, about six weeks after his death but Thomas failed to pick up on any romantic undertones, despite a shirtless Livingstone helping with Thomas’ latest masterpiece by wrapping his arms around her to the soundtrack of Unchained Melody.
“It made sense that he’d be interested,” said Thomas, “I’d only just bought a new, bigger, blunger, and I’ve got the best muffle kiln in the county. Who wouldn’t want to have a go on that?”
Livingstone, who in life had shown no interest whatsoever in the ceramic arts, was soon regularly participating in intense sculpture sessions with Thomas, in which he would sit behind her at the potter’s wheel and they would intertwine their fingers in the slippery, yet firm clay, sculpting long, thick, tubular vases while becoming coated in the sticky substance.
“He would get very excited when I told him we were going to use the penetrometer to test for hardness,” Thomas continued. “And when I explained that we needed to flocculate to get it harder he was practically drooling. But who wouldn’t find that exciting?”
“And now I find that all along, he was trying to have sex with me or something?! I wish he’d just told me. I feel like an absolute prat.”
Livingstone commented: “ditto”.
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