A complete and utter cockwomble has reportedly appointed themselves as an expert in your personal circumstances, deciding in their infinite wisdom that your autism is “only mild”.

Local fucktrumpet Natasha Weaving, 39, whose concept of autism is limited to The Big Bang Theory and the special little children she so charitably and loudly volunteers with, reportedly can’t understand how you can be disabled when you aren’t personally showing her the full extent of your disability, and has decided to lump you in with the gluten intolerant, the lower-middle class, and people with sprained ankles.

Weaving said, shitgibbonly: “It’s a good thing, though, isn’t it? It clearly doesn’t bother you that much, because I’ve seen you walk, talk and smile unassisted. Proper Autism is when tiny white people can’t do anything, and Sort-Of Autism is when women in their thirties wear sunflower lanyards and give inspirational talks during the office lunch break. You have the latter type, which basically means you’re normal.”

The wazzock continued: “I’ve watched enough TED Talks to know that autism is a superpower. I’m so inspired by all the darling little children with autism who can paint a flawless still life or earn a PhD before the age of 8. Donating to all their GoFundMes reminds me to be grateful for my lack of autism.”

“Actually, can I talk to you about something? I noticed you’ve been saying ‘autistic’, which is an offensive term. Try to use person-first language next time.”


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