Non-autistic people worldwide are due to collectively engage in a series of worrying rituals known as “Christmas traditions”, according to reports.
Despite your family’s apparent concern about how much you love Legend of Zelda, it’s about to be socially acceptable to fixate on nothing but a single day in the calendar for weeks on end (and that’s totally fine).
“Neurotypicals tend to get rather obsessed during the festive season,” behavioural psychologist, Navya Randhawa, explained. “Around this time, you’ll start to see them exhibit strange behaviour, like hoarding copious amounts of disgusting cheeses.”
“They’ll spend four weeks playing the same Shaking Stevens track on repeat – in the same breath as telling you to stop going on about the Wilhelm Gustloff boating disaster.”
Randhawa advised: “Although this might seem counterintuitive, we suggest playing along with it or else you’ll be accused of ruining “the spirit of Christmas”.
Neurotypical, Tricia Squire, 61, commented: “My autistic daughter is very odd” – before standing up in front of the television for the King’s speech.
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