An autistic woman whose colleague politely enquired about her well-being has somehow responded without going into traumatic detail about last night’s poop attack, it has been rumoured.
Paige Thomas, 32, was greeted by in the usual manner receptionist by Jack Harrington, 26, when she arrived at the digital marketing company where they both work. Incredibly, she answered: “Fine, thanks. Bit of a dicky tummy though.”
“It went against all instincts,” said Thomas. “Last night I pooped so hard it should have been preceded by a countdown. Somewhere in Texas there’s a room full of scientists celebrating the moment I launched off the bog seat.”
“There was one hard poop that I think was acting as a sort of cork,” she elaborated. “Once that was out, the rest was like a champagne bottle.”
She added: “When I think about what I could have told him, the fact that I just gave him the headline is nothing short of heroic. Where’s my medal?”
Thomas then ended the interview, due to having to go and neck some Imodium while figuring out which of her colleagues could handle the truth without reporting her to HR.
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