Autistic people have issued a statement explaining to Boris Johnson that autism does not cause you to become a compulsively lying, law-breaking, nation-wrecking cunt.
The statement encourages Johnson – who claimed in a Telegraph interview that he can be “a bit on the spectrum” – to fuck all the way off, and once he gets there, to fuck off even further.
It read: “Oh no you fucking don’t. Seriously, you tosspot, you’re not one of us and we wouldn’t want you even if you were. Step one foot on our lovely spectrum and we’ll yeet you directly into the sun.”
“Furthermore, there isn’t an autistic on the planet who would go to those lengths to have a party.”
The statement went on to link to a psychopathy checklist, suggesting “this might be more your speed.”
The news follows attempts by Neil Gaiman and Gregg Wallace to blame their shitheadery on an already marginalised community who don’t want to harm anyone and care very much about the feelings of others but WOULD JUST LIKE YOU TO TURN THE BIG LIGHT OFF.
Autistics were last seen forming a protective circle around the DSM-5, in case the next person to try it on is Hannibal Lecter.
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