Autistic Pride Day is to provide a much-needed temporary respite from the remainder of a year spent marinating in shame, it has been rumoured. 

The event, which takes place today, the 18th of June, encourages autistics to feel positive about themselves – until the clock strikes 12, turning them back into neurotic balls of self-loathing. 

Autism advocate, Sarah Harrow, 27, said: “Autistic Pride Day is a chance to be celebrated for who I am, instead of vividly recalling every social mistake I’ve ever made.”

“It’s a lovely rest from having to think about the time I was 11 and congratulated a family friend on a pregnancy that turned out to be a food baby,” continued Harrow. “Or the day I tried to join in a thing called ‘banter’ and made Ryan Wilkins cry so hard his mum had to come and get him from sixth form.”

“But I don’t have to relive any of that today,” Harrow added. “Today I get to post a load of rainbows and infinity symbols and forget that Ryan dropped out of college the next day.”

Harrow was last seen on Instagram, drowning out The Thoughts with a deluge of rainbows and infinity symbols. 

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