Headline by John Butler
A set of tattered rags loosely held together by fraying threads that no longer remotely resemble a hoodie still has “plenty of wear left”, an autistic man has claimed.
Dexter Livingstone, 48, reportedly refuses to give up on the beloved garment, despite it now stretching the limits of what can be reasonably considered a “garment”.
“Hoodies are meant to have holes. Where else are you supposed to put your arms and head?” Livingstone explained, sticking his head through the massive rip at the elbow.
“From certain angles, you can’t even tell,” he continued. “Look at this aerial shot from Google Earth. I rest my case.”
“The fact is you’ll have to pry it from my cold, dead hands,” Livingstone added. “CAREFULLY! It’s delicate.”
At the time of writing, Livingstone has yet to throw out the “hoodie”, despite it now being nothing more than a pointy little hat.
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