Misaligned bathroom tile prompts letter of complaint to God, Santa, or anyone who will listen
An autistic person using a new bathroom for the first time has had to delay their urgent bodily functions due to spotting something truly horrific on the walls, it has been reported. While everyone else who has used the bathroom has either not noticed, or...
Autistic man amazed to discover that maps bear some relation to the 3D world
An autistic man with an extensive collection of Ordnance Survey maps has been reportedly staggered to learn that some people use these 2D stimming devices to navigate their environment. Lloyd Didcot, 22, loves spending hours poring over the shapes of the coastlines and finding silly-sounding...
Autistic woman’s fragile state of mind revealed in increasingly dark crochet animals
An autistic woman who stated that she’s “Fine, honestly, fine. Fine! Why does everyone keep asking?!” has been unintentionally revealing her spiralling mood through her art, concerned bystanders have reported. Krista Shure, 23, who thinks she’s taken up a sweet, creative hobby crocheting teeny tiny...
Friend who asked a simple question blocks out a few hours on the calendar to wade through autistic woman’s reply
A friend who has had to block out a few hours on their calendar to fully digest a meandering, 3000-word response to their question was really only hoping for a yes or no answer, sources have reported. Eddie Albington, 25, explained: “I thought I might...
Organised scavenger hunt fails to account for autistic competence
This article is an It’s a Superpower?? special, set in the world of our audio sitcom! To find out more, see the bottom of the piece. What promised to be the world’s most complex scavenger hunt has failed to take into account autistic people’s propensity to actually...
Grinning autistic woman repeats pun in case you didn’t hear it the first three times
An autistic woman currently wearing a shit-eating grin like the Cheshire Cat who got the cream will repeat her latest pun as many times as necessary until she gets the response she’s hoping for, sources have reported. Olivia Buckingham, 34, and wife Navya Randhawa, 31,...
Friend sadly too neurotypical to understand any of your references
Your one and only friend who you didn’t meet on a Stargate SG-1 messaging board in the early 2000s is reportedly “too neurotypical” to understand any of your references to either popular or unpopular culture. Kelsey Dacey, 37, is apparently what’s known as a “regular...
World-famous magicians kindly agreed to meet “biggest autistic fan” before they realised it was a 39-year-old man
This article is an It’s a Superpower?? special, set in the world of our audio sitcom! To find out more, see the bottom of the piece. A pair of world-famous magicians who charitably agreed to meet their “biggest autistic fan” immediately regretted their generosity after...
The Great Sun Myth: new documentary seeks to answer question – where does it go when it’s dark?
A groundbreaking new documentary reportedly seeks to question the conventional narrative around the mysterious and unknowable orb at the centre of our galaxy. The Great Sun Myth, from the producers of Not Quite Walls, Not Quite Gaps: What are Doors? and Trees: What’s Their Game?,...
Preventative! Autistic woman bakes for entire population, just in case someone out there is mad at her
This article is an It’s a Superpower?? special, set in the world of our audio sitcom! To find out more, see the bottom of the piece. An autistic woman whose greatest fear is someone being cross with her has reportedly baked enough cakes, pastries and...