Your autism assessor diagnosed you the second you walked into her office, tearfully fidgeting with your neon pink hair, it has been rumoured.
Clinical psychologist Tricia Squire, 45, has admitted that she took one look at your whole deal and was like “well, let’s go through the motions anyway”.
Squire said: “Assessment forms and discussions are useful diagnostic tools, but not nearly as effective as watching you struggling to untie your shoelaces, apologising to the wall you just bumped into, then spending the first 15 minutes of the session agonising over how to pick a chair without the others feeling left out.”
“But OK, you’ve waited three years for this,” Squire continued. “Let’s talk about your childhood, I guess?”
You commented: “God, I’m so anxious for my appointment. What if I’m not really autistic?”
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